Imagine a community Coming of Age celebration in which girls entering puberty are honored with song, dance, stories and gifts. All their friends and relatives are there. It’s an event to be remembered for a lifetime! To honor the creative force that is manifesting within them, their elders gather to offer encouragement and guidance.
This has been the experience of many young women throughout history, and is a tradition in some places even today.
Yet, girls in modern culture receive a very different initiation, don’t they? It’s even been called the “Wrongs of Passage,” rather than the “Rites of Passage,” because a resounding silence greets young women at the advent of puberty. There is certainly no celebration!
The message is that menstruation should be hidden, and ignored as much as possible. We’ve come to think of something so powerful and mysterious as nothing more than a burden! Girls can feel overwhelming embarrassment and even shame, at puberty.
Of course, this does not set girls up for success with their cycles. No wonder so many of us have a hard time! The burden of this disconnect from our own rhythms can take its toll on our self-esteem and health, over a lifetime.
If only there were a better way – and there is!
We can get back to the sense of celebration for our girls, and catch up with ourselves at the same time. After all, most moms never got the welcome they deserved, either!
Many of us were raised with so little understanding of our bodies and cycles. Even if our moms tried to be helpful or positive, they probably didn’t have much to go on, and just couldn’t find the words to say. And so the habits of silence were passed to another generation.
How different it would be if a mother could welcome her daughter into a meaningful women’s tradition, and take the time to consider what these changes of puberty mean. With menstruation, she will have a rhythm like the moon! She will have phases of darkness and light, which she can learn to care for, predict, and use to her advantage!
Together you can create a story that will inspire her imagination with possibilities!
You can honor Coming of Age in a way that is just right for her.
How can we change the way we view our own bodies and help our daughters approach this passage with pride?
This question is at the heart of the Mother’s MOON Kit: Preparing for Your Daughter’s Coming of Age. Through these activities, a girl’s developing menstrual rhythm is compared to the comforting rhythms of nature. Her own experience is woven into the familiar phases of the moon and seasons.
She learns how her monthly ebb and flow can actually help her balance her life, take time for herself, and stay healthy!
The Mother’s MOON Kit gives lots of support for moms as well, because these ideas may be new for you, too!
You’ll be guided to review your own coming of age, all those years ago, and give some love and support to your own “inner girl.” It is never too late to welcome her into the circle of women.
You’ll also be guided to share personal stories, hopes and wishes, and create small gifts for your daughter. She can make small crafts and crowns as well, and perhaps decorate a rose to give to you when she gets her first period!
The Mother’s MOON Kit is designed to help you create some keepsake crafts and memories, with suggestions for ongoing conversations. It’s good to start young, around ages 8 – 10, with conversations about the moon, seasons, women, and what it all means. You may want to start even younger!
Even if your girl wants nothing to do with an actual celebration when the time comes, you’ll be catching up with your own “inner girl,” and giving yourself some recognition that you never got! This will help you celebrate, anyway, and it will bring subtle support to your connection with your daughter!
If you do want some sort of celebration with her or for her, you can design it to suit your family, according to your traditions, religious beliefs and personalities.
There are so many ways that we can do this differently, and empower girls to connect with their own creative cycle, with pride in their body and abilities.
Honoring this time of change has been shown to have a lasting effect on a girl’s feelings toward her cycle. Even very simple moments, with a few meaningful words, can have lasting significance.
I wish you all the best, and I’d love to hear YOUR stories and ideas as we reclaim our respect for our miraculous bodies!